This day last week I found out I was pregnant.
I had an abortion 4 days ago.
We booked the abortion the night I found out and flew to England four days later because abortion is illegal here in Ireland.
It cost us 1000euro between the abortion, flights and hotel.
I was a week overdue my period but was in denial of the fact that I might be pregnant.
My boyfriend begged me on this morning to take a pregnancy test to ease our minds.
That evening I took the test and it was positive. I was shocked. My boyfriend arrived at my apartment 20 minutes after I told him. He held me in his arms and I broke down crying, I couldn't believe it.
We went for a long walk and spoke about what we were going to do. We both agreed that we were too young and not in a position to look after a child. Rob has a job but I'm in my degree year of college and I want to travel when i finish and then do a post-grad. I don't want to throw this all away.
I knew, we both knew, this was the right decision for where we were in our lives.
So that night (this day, last week) we went online and looked for a clinic. I rang the number and booked an appointment.
The procedure itself wasn't so bad. It seemed extremely short. I had it done under general anesthetic so i was asleep. While I was having the procedure done my boyfriend walked into the city and found a hotel for us, he text me with the details. The nurse rang me a taxi to the hotel when I was ready to leave.
I cried the whole way to the hotel.
I cried that night.
The next day I was ok.
But yesterday I spent the whole day crying.
Today I was a little better but I'm bleeding a lot and have very bad cramps.
I'm riddled with all sorts of emotions that just keep coming and going. Feelings of sadness and guilt.
I have college tomorrow. First day back since the procedure. I hope I can concentrate. I haven't been able to concentrate on anything since.
I have my 21st party in 3 days. I don't know how I'm going to enjoy myself.